By Dave Barry
Basically, this is a snow globe, but when you shake it, instead of artificial snowflakes, there are artificial sperm cells swimming around. At least we hope they’re artificial, because they’re the size of tadpoles, so if they’re real, we do not want to meet the man they came from.
In the middle of the globe is a model of an egg cell, which is being penetrated by one of the sperm cells, whom we will call Mr. Lucky. The manufacturer describes this as “a great visual for you teachers trying to explain the reproductive process.” We’re sure it is! We can easily picture youngsters learning a lot from this and even discussing it with their parents.
FIRST PARENT: What did you learn in school today?
CHILD: Mr. Johnson taught us about sex.
SECOND PARENT: Really? How?
CHILD: He shook his sperm globe.
FIRST PARENT: I’m calling the police.
$19.95 plus shipping and handling from Teacher’s Discovery, 2676 Paldan Dr., Auburn Hills, Mich. 48326, 888-977-2436; www.teachersdiscovery-science.com
Suggested by Laura Graze of Belleville, Ill.
Read the rest: Dear Santa: Please pay no attention to Dave Barry’s Holiday Gift Guide – 12/05/2009 – MiamiHerald.com.
